The Problem With Mother Nature

While scientists continue to pour on irrefutable evidence that Global Warming is indeed a reality and something that we as a society need to fix, politicians and religious leaders just don't want to give in. For every logical and rational argument that science puts out there, politics lashes back with a crazy and unfounded counter-point. But the facts are adding up and the politicians are running out of crappy excuses for the sudden rise in temperature. So I came up with a new one that just might work.

Consider this: perhaps Mother Earth is simply having hot flashes. Put into the perspective of the timeline of the entire Universe, Mother Earth is at about that age where she should be experiencing Menopause. Her bodies of water are going through some changes, but this is totally normal; lots of women go through this natural change everyday. And Nature is prepared for this shift. In fact, this isn't the first time Mother Earth has experienced this sort of thing. Think back to when the ice ages ended and the polar caps all melted and flooded the Earth. That was Mother Earth getting her first period!

This excuse will work like a charm. Anytime a guy hears that a girl is going through her "lady times," he shuts up right away, no questions asked. In fact, most guys have no idea what "lady times" really entail, and are willing to assume anything that happens during those times is perfectly normal.

The problem with the politicians' current tactic is that they are using arguments that the scientists are comfortable talking about. Nothing, however, makes a nerd more uncomfortable than a hot girl... and that's exactly what Mother Earth is right now.